July 15, 2014

Twenty Three

As I have said, I had an amazing birthday this year. One can't beat Disneyland for a day full of fun! Better than my last few birthdays combined, this year I not only had a great day, but am in a much better place personally. Last year I was in the midst of my quarter life crisis; having graduated without a job lined up. I'll admit I still struggle with the occasionally overwhelming stresses of not having a job yet, but I am doing better than last year. I am trying my best to not focus on the pressure to have it all figured out. Hopefully I will get a job this year and wont have to spend another year worrying about getting settled.

I know it seems strange to be worried about having it all figured out at 23, but I can't help it! Society has trained me to think I am supposed to be wildly successful and if I'm not I'v done something wrong. I just have to re-train my brain into accepting a more realistic timeline. No one warns you how terrifying finishing college and pretending to be an adult is! I'm trying to find my way, thank goodness for my amazing internship and accommodating parents! Now I finally think I know which direction to swim in, before I run out of energy treading water. I have always loved museums, I don't know why I hadn't considered working in them before. Other dreams seemed brighter at the time, but now I want nothing more than to find a job in the museum field!

Anyways, back on the birthday track. Last year for my 22nd birthday I made a list of 22 things I wanted to do before I turned 23. Of the things on that list I managed to do (or partially do) only 7 off the list!

Of the 22 items on my list, here are the 7 I actually managed to make progress with:

1) Read the books I already own (well...sorta? I also got a kindle so that has slowed my actual book reading a bit, but I managed a few)
2) Finish the first draft of my first novel (nope, but I am getting closer!)
3) Blog more often! (Definitely! I have been blogging consistently for over a year now!)
4) Use up my fabric stores (I have certainly made a dent in my fabric stash!)
11) Find a job or internship (YES! thank goodness for my Denver Art Museum Internship!)
15) Get my first tattoo (Yes! and I love it, I can't wait to get my next one)
19) Watch old movies (a few, I need to watch a lot more!)

I think I can do better than 7 this next year, I most certainly want to at any rate! Without further ado, this years list-

1) Read 25 books in 2014

I made a goal this year to try and read 25 books. I love to read, I just don't make the time anymore but I have vowed this must change! This year I have managed to read 7 books so far including the Divergent series. I have a long list of books to go, I really want to start the Cormoran Strike novels from JK Rowling (aka Robert Galbraith) for example. I just need to make the time!

2) Finish the first draft of my novel

I have been working to finish the first draft forever. I need to finish the last 2/5ths of it -ish- so I still have work to do!

3) Finish more historical costumes

I finished a lovely Edwardian gown but little else this year. I have a lovely purple silk waiting to be an 18th century jacket, a floral cotton 18th century jacket planned, I want a proper Victorian corset, and a traveling suit to go with it!

4) Redo my website

I really need to completely renovate biancaesposito.com, its a good thing my mom knows how to code now!

5) Learn how to use my camera (Nikon 5200)

This is one of the hold over goals from last year, I still really need to learn how to use my camera!

6) Get fit

Seriously, I am so out of shape! Time to get serious and start dieting again too, I like that better than have to work out, which I will have to do to eventually too but....time to get healthy, how boring!

7) Go to the theater more often (or opera, or ballet)

Another hold over, hopefully when I get a job I'll be able to afford going to more shows and the symphony etc. After all I love getting dressed up!

8) Find a job

I am loving my internship, I can only hope that there is a museum job out there somewhere for me. Fingers crossed!

9) Get back to Europe

My mom wants to visit France after she graduates next May, here's hoping I get to go with!

10) Get my tattoo touched up

Now that I have my lovely tattoo I need to make an appointment to get it touched up, as my skin doesn't like ink as much as I do apparently. It still looks fine but it could be darker/colored in a bit more. All I have to do is make the appointment but I have been procrastinating for ages!

13) Get my next tattoo

Sensing a theme are we? Yes of course I have more planned, just little things I have had in mind for a long time. I can't help that I have always innately liked tattoos! It's a good thing I don't have the money right now or I'd be booking for more than just a touch up!

14) Figure out 20's hair

As much as I love 20's styles (as long time readers know) I just can't wrangle my thick hair into finger waves as easily as I'd like. I want to be able to wear the style more often and in the spirit of this goal I have already bought some new tools to achieve the look with my birthday money. I will show you all soon I promise!

15) Watch Mad Men

Seriously, this was on this list last year but it still stands. I have only ever finished season 1, so I have a long way to go!

16) Watch more old films

I have finally started catching older films on Netflix when I can. I have a lot of old Hollywood to watch, luckily most of those older films are available online somehow these days.

17) Visit the Byers Evans House Museum

This is a local one, the Byers Evans House is a preserved Victorian property right next to the Denver art Museum where I work. I need to leave a few hours early one day and pop in as I tend to love house museums.

18) Make new hats

I didn't make time for millinery this past year and I miss making hats! I just love hats after all, and I need a few more practical/wearable options to incorporate into my everyday wardrobe.

19) Dress up

By dress up I mean dress well essentially. I have been doing really well with this so far this spring and summer since I have been working in retail! There is a tendency in America to dress really casually (the jeans-and-t-shirt most days or worse kinda casual), and I have really been enjoying putting on pencil skirts and blouses or dresses this summer and generally dressing well. Looking better really does make one feel better too.

20) Revamp Etsy store

Though my Etsy store already got a small re-model with the name changing over to The Closet Historian earlier this year, I want to do more by shooting new photographs for some of my jewelry. I also want to add a vintage section for some things I find or never wear. In line with making more hats, there will be a section for those too eventually.

21)  Organize and catalog my personal library

I'd love to know just how many and what books I have. My collection is spread out between a bookshelf in my bedroom, another in my sewing room, books still packed in boxes from various moves and then lastly in random stacks scattered around. Hopefully if when I get my own place this year the entire collection can be reunited and cataloged for reference.

22) Paint/Draw more often

Once upon a time I wanted to be a painter when I grew up. I'v painted my whole life up until I started college then I stopped. I need to pick up my pencils and brushes again (after all, I already own all the materials!)

23) Meet new people

The last item on my list, just like last year, is the quest to meet new people and make more friends out there in the big wide world. Without school it can be rather hard to find like minded people around (I had trouble with this in college too in fact). I should research local vintage groups/meet-ups but I never have! If I end up moving to a larger city this year it will be a higher priority. I am a bit of an introvert generally, I can keep myself quite amused and enjoy my alone time. That doesn't mean I wouldn't like some new Mad Men watching, cinema going, antique mall browsing friends though!

So there is this years list, hopefully I can do better than last year and acomplish more than 7 items! Birthdays are strange as you get older. I'm not old enough to dread them yet, but I am also too old for them to feel only just exciting. Birthday's are another mile marker, reminding me I have let another year pass without finishing that darn novel, or other, sillier things. Sometimes I hold myself to unreasonably high standards, perhaps these weird birthday feelings help me to recognize that and let go a little more.

For now, I am excited about the year ahead. My 23rd year could be my very best yet, I just have to wait and see! I look forward to traveling, sewing, writing and blogging throughout the journey! Stay tuned...


  1. That's a great list of plans! I love writing lists and making goals and I love reading other people's. Good luck with it. You will certainly have a fun year if you do all those things.

    On the front of direction and career, when I was 22/23 I was enrolled in an engineering PhD and I was the most miserable I have ever been. I quit, fumbled without direction for a while, then started a teaching degree and taught for 6-7 years, and have now quit that profession too. Don't stress :) There is plenty of time to work life out, and as long as you keep working towards *something*, it's ok for that to be uncertain and change lots!

    1. I am a list maker too, I make to do lists all day long! I'm even one of those who will put things on the list I'v already accomplished that day just to have the next-second satisfaction of crossing them off!

      And thank you for your encouraging words, I know the average person switches careers like five times or something throughout their lifetime, I would juts like a start with career #1 at least! soon I hope :)


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